baby talk

Before I begin, I have two pre-post notices:

#1 My posts haven't been extremely regular... for two reasons. One: I don't think I have nearly enough interesting things to say to be updating daily. No, I'm not that cool, and even I know that. Two: the Mr. needs a computer much more than I do at school everyday. I would only use it for playing Bejeweled, updating my blog, and stalking people on facebook. (Any chance to take two of those away from me is a good thing.) So I'm sorry that there aren't too many updates, but I guess that's how this blog will work.

#2 From my last post about saving, I didn't mean to say that we are the only ones in this hard financial time. I know that we are truly blessed to be constantly provided for, to have a job that can and will pay the bills, and to have people around us that will support us if it comes to that. I know there are many of you out there in the exact same boat (or maybe an even more tippy-er one.) I just meant to say that it is a new lifestyle for me, one to which I need much adjustment.

Now for the baby talk...

Let me tell you a little about our pregnancy. Mr. Allen and I were married June 3rd this year, and just a few weeks later (July 17th) we found out we were pregnant. No, for those of you who really think we are crazy, we did not plan this baby. It was how you say an "accident," but I much more prefer the words "absolute blessing." We are more than thrilled to be having Cubbie come into our world, our family.

So let's back up a few months again... there was this time in our lives where I thought to myself (based on nature's lovely way of letting women know), 'Wow, I might be pregnant. I should probably take a test and find out.' At this point I was a nervous wreck thinking about all the ways this is not good timing for us, how could we possibly do this, this cannot be true, this cannot be happening. And so, I peed on a stick, and read it, and it had one line, and then this faint little other line that I was so sure and so thankful about meaning we are not pregnant. And I'm pretty sure I sang a few rounds of the doxology as I announced the news to the Mr. But then he sat there completely disappointed that we weren't having a baby.

A week later, I was still getting that lovely sign from mother nature that I really should be pregnant or something is really wrong with me. And during this week I had a complete change of mindset. I watched the FRIENDS episode when Rachel finds out she is pregnant, and I cried. I was so jealous. (Jealousy... a major fault of mine which I will address in a later post.) I needed that baby. I needed to be pregnant. I needed to be a mother.

That weekend we came back from a camping trip where we had discussed a lot again the possibility of being pregnant or that I needed to go see the gyno and figure myself out. I took another test. (Good thing they sell those things in two-packs.) I waited, eagerly this time, for those 3 minutes to pass. I went back in the bathroom and saw the same signs I saw before: one line bold and one faint. At this point I realized, that faint line, well that's the line that is always there. It's the one that is on there before I pee on it. It set in. We're having a baby. I danced as I walked into the other room and showed him. We rejoiced and hugged and smiled and loved every second of the experience. We were on cloud 1000 (if there are only 9 to start with that is.)

... more to come. This should quench your little baby mama bear blog thirst for a little while. Hopefully I'll be able to write again sometime this week and fill in the middle of the story, because we have an OB check-up Friday, and hopefully that will be even more story to share.

with pure joy.